The Toilet Paper Joke
A blonde, a brunette and a redhead were walking along the beach. A seagull flies over and craps all over the blonde.
The brunette says in a disgusted voice, “Hang on the bathroom is just up the hill, I’ll go get some toilet paper.”
After she leaves the blonde begins to laugh.
The redhead says, “What’s so funny?”
The blonde says, “Well, blondes are supposed to be so dumb and look at her. By the time she gets back with that toilet paper that seagull will be miles away!”
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A little old lady goes into the store to do some shopping. She is
bewildered over the large selection of toilet paper.
“Pardon me, sir,” she says to the store manager, “but can you explain the
differences in all these toilet papers?”
“Well,” he replies pointing out one brand, “this is as soft as a
baby’skiss.
It’s $1.50 per roll.” He grabs another and says, “This is nice and soft,
strong but gentle, and it’s $1.00 a roll.” Pointing to the bottom shelf he
tells her, “We call that our No Name brand, and it’s 20cents per roll.”
“Give me the No Name,” she says.
She comes back about a week later, seeks out the manager and says, “Hey!
I’ve got a name for your No Name toilet paper. I call it John Wayne.”
“Why?” he asks.
“Because it’s rough, it’s tough and it don’t take crap off anybody!”
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Whats dumb? Instructions on toilet paper.
Whats dumber than that? reading them.
Whats even dumber? Reading them and learning something.
Dumbest of all? Reading them and having to correct something you’ve been doing wrong.
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Q: How many men does it take to put a roll of toilet paper on the hanger?
A: No one knows… its never happened
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This bartender is in a bar, when this really hot chick walks up and says in a sexy seductive voice, “May I please speak to your manager?” He says, “Not right now, is there anything I can help you with?” She replies, “I don’t know if your the man to talk to…its kind of personal…” Thinking he might get lucky, he goes, “I’m pretty sure I can handle your problem, miss.” She then looks at him with a smile, and puts two of her fingers in his mouth…and he begins sucking them, thinking “I’m in!!!” She goes, “Can you give the manager something for me?” The bartender nods…yes. “Tell him there’s no toilet paper in the ladies restroom.”
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